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  LiveWire / Teen Forums / Short Stories & Poetry / Viewing Topic

Poem I wrote last night ~ Comment and hopefully enjoy
Replies: 6Last Post July 19 12:09pm by Anonymous
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( Anonymous )

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Imagine a place,
Where men roam free and chastised.
Where the bird sings songs of destruction and deceit.
Where the trees swing freely in the cold still air,
Welcome to the Land of Non.
I've been to a place,
Where the children are laboring freely.
Where the bee refuses to fly and pick pollen.
Where the ocean sits still at high tide.
Welcome to the Land of Non.

I am afraid of the place,
Where the babies are crying murder.
Where the deer is shot before it is born.
Where all hope ceases to exist.
Welcome to the Land of Non.

I cannot leave the place,
Where men's dreams are always crushed.
Where sex and love are no longer existent.
Where a name means nothing.
Welcome to the Land of Non.

Insanity exists in the place,
Where there is eternal night forever.
Where the bear devours his only cubs.
Where blood red is the color of the grass.
Welcome to the Land of Non.

I know where is this place,
Where all men are ravaged by war.
Where death and rape is commonplace.
Where we will be our own destruction.
Welcome to Earth.


I made a tropic about is recently, but zero to no people were on LW, so it thought i would try again during LW rush hour.

What do you think?


12:04 pm on July 19, 2008
leahslove


Dairy Product Addict
Reply
it's cool

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I LoVE YoU aNd You KnoW Who U ARe I WAnt To AsK You A QuesTiOn

12:06 pm on July 19, 2008 | Joined June 2008 | 31 Days Active
Join to learn more about leahslove Illinois, United States | Bisexual Female | 809 Posts | 1376 Points
Permious


Executive
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I think it needs sexing up. Phallic imagery, innuendo, let's give this bitch some life.

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Merry Christmas, bitches! xxx

12:06 pm on July 19, 2008 | Joined July 2008 | 54 Days Active
Join to learn more about Permious Arkansas, United States | Straight Female | 2591 Posts | 3169 Points
Eris


Executive
Reply
It's not bad.
Like the end, where it says earth instead


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eternally, Eris...♥

12:07 pm on July 19, 2008 | Joined Mar. 2007 | 228 Days Active
Join to learn more about Eris Ohio, United States | Straight Female | 1455 Posts | 3874 Points
( Anonymous )

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Quote: from Permious at 12:06 pm on July 19, 2008

I think it needs sexing up. Phallic imagery, innuendo, let's give this bitch some life.

what would you recommend?


12:07 pm on July 19, 2008
fouad


Soothsayer
Reply
very good indeed.. why are u anon?

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one hundred years  of solitude

12:08 pm on July 19, 2008 | Joined Nov. 2006 | 238 Days Active
Join to learn more about fouad Lebanon | Straight Male | 9492 Posts | 12953 Points
( Anonymous )

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Quote: from fouad at 12:08 pm on July 19, 2008

very good indeed.. why are u anon?

because i am the anonymous man  


12:09 pm on July 19, 2008
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